Confession: My Ideal Wedding
Written by Sara on September 10, 2009 – 12:59 pm -J and I have significantly different ideas about what kind of wedding we hope to have. While he wants to be married in the afternoon and proceed on to a fun-filled wedding reception full of food, mini-golf and dancing at Vintage, a reception venue we both love, I want the exact opposite: I want to be married in the morning, and I want to serve brunch at our wedding reception. I want to feel like I’m attending a fancy tea party.
Maybe it’s because I think breakfast food will be cheaper (which could be totally wrong), or maybe it’s because I don’t want our wedding guests singing Neil Diamond songs as they raise their 11th can of beer in the air…but the more I think about it, everything about having a “conventional” wedding reception just makes me want to elope, so we can avoid drunken speeches, wedding favors and the need to provide our guests with midnight snacks.
To offer a little clarification, my ideal wedding day involves the following:
- Morning wedding ceremony (of no more than 85 guests) in the Chapel of Reconciliation on the college campus of my alma mater, Augustana College, followed by a cocktail hour at an air-conditioned location where sunshine can stream through the windows [as of now, I can't stand the idea of getting married in July without air conditioning!].
- Brunch feast, including french toast, pancakes, waffles, omlettes, egg bakes, coffee cakes, finger sandwiches, fruit, muffins, a wedding cake bar, Mimosas, champagne, tea, coffee, juice, etc, with yard games and mini-golf to follow.
The problems with this scenario: When do we take pictures? Do we have a wedding dance? If so, will our guests feel strange dancing in the middle of the day? Will we? [J has already shared his concern over dancing in the daytime.]
The main problem: J is not a fan of this wedding day plan at all. While a small, intimate wedding shapes my ideal day, his wish list includes entertaining around 150 guests who enjoy themselves by dancing their hearts out until the wee morning hours.
I know that my disdain for conventional wedding receptions stems from my need to buck tradition in favor of saving money. Truthfully, as I receive more and more outrageous quotes from vendors, I feel extremely uncomfortable with spending large amounts of our money on one day in our lives. Luckily, J’s parents (my future in-laws) have offered to help us self-cater the wedding to cut costs, but given that receptions often amount to one half of a couple’s wedding budget, I can’t imagine spending such obscene amounts of money on one part of our day.
Furthermore, as an extremely light drinker myself, I have felt very opposed to consuming large amounts of alcohol at wedding receptions in the name of love and celebration, and I fear feeling uncomfortable at my own wedding reception if our guests chose to over-indulge. My assumption in this situation is that by having a morning event and by serving only champagne and Mimosas, widespread drunkenness can be avoided (for the most part.)
I have been tirelessly imagining ways to bridge the gap between J and my wedding ideas, but the only solution I came up with is to have an early afternoon wedding (2 p.m.) and then serve “brinner” (as Scrubs fans know to be brunch at dinner time). However, serving breakfast for dinner for a wedding reception sounds even more strange than a morning wedding.
I feel extremely excited about the prospect of having a bridal shower (tea party theme!), a bachelorette party (morning at the spa, anyone?), and a gift-opening event (the conventional approach to this one is brunch, which I love!). However, I’m not excited about the prospect of the wedding reception itself, mostly because I don’t see how to incorporate my love of a tea party’s simplicity and elegance into the evening.
Readers: do you have insight to share?
I would love to hear from you.
[Top photo: 100 Layer Cake; bottom two photos: Google]
Tags: 100 Layer Cake, Augustana College, Chapel of Reconciliation, mimosa, Neil Diamond, Scrubs
Posted in Budget Weddings, Cakes & Cuisine, Our Wedding | 3 Comments »