Guest Post: More Money, More Balloons

Written by Sara on May 21, 2010 – 9:00 am -

It’s been awhile since my man Jordan has dropped by to offer his take on wedding planning, so here’s a fun-loving post from Jordan on what our wedding would look like if he had an unlimited budget and the upper hand:

Throughout our engagement, I have noticed that Sara has had the final say on green lighting projects for the wedding. I trust her decision making as she really has put together a wonderful package that her and I can both be proud of. I have made a few suggestions along the way, and some have passed the test, while others were quickly dismissed. This is okay, I completely understand, and couldn’t be happier with the upcoming event.

However, that’s not the point of this guest post. This post is just for fun; it’s me pretending that if I were to plan a few big things for the wedding, regardless of practicality, cost, or anything else, here’s what I’d do.  Who knows – maybe if an idea gets enough support, I can get a green light!

In order:

Number 5 — Rainbow Tuxes

This is a slightly goofy option, but I really enjoy personality, and while its far from traditional, I think people have more fun when they get a little more abstract. How much more fun and a greater memory for all would it be if everyone was wearing some different brightly colored tux? I think it would be outrageously fun!

[Sara's note: It's rather interesting that he thinks this, considering I literally BEGGED him to let my girls wear dresses the color of the rainbow, and he quickly turned me down. Hmmm...]

Number 4 — Jon Miller and Joe Morgan doing Play-By-Play and Color Announcing

Perhaps this is slightly far fetched, but I’d be excited for impersonators to go over any type of video we record for the wedding and give a play-by-play and color analysis, as if they were on Sunday Night Baseball. I generally hate announcers, but I enjoy Jon Miller, and I enjoy to make fun of Joe Morgan, so I think it would be just smashing and potentially really humorous if we find someone who can nail the Morgan role.

Number 3 — Absolutely no country music played at any time.

I really detest country music. I could say about 1400 bad things about it that I’ll likely get no response to, but I just can’t stand it. A country song will suck the fun right out of me and will just murder my attention span. There’s not a single country song in my music library, and despite being forced to sit through it in my 24 years of life, I have yet to enjoy a single one. I honestly prefer boy bands over country music, as with them at least the music is catchy and danceable. Country music offers nothing, but (age old cliche from country music haters) my dog died, my wife left me, and my friends don’t know me, wah wah wah, suck.

Number 2 — Rethinking the gift-opening event.

I am not a huge fan of gift-openings, either. I love to give and get gifts, but to me, gift-giving is so much better at random periods of time than at designated events or days. There’s nothing wrong with holidays, anniversaries, or gift-opening events, but I just don’t really enjoy focusing my attention or being the focus of attention during this time. I suggest we just wrap the entire gift-opening party around a large kickball game (or a similar event) that everyone participates in, and in between innings, we open a gift or two. That way, there’s ample time for breaks, thank you’s, and everything else, while there’s always that game to look forward to and keep everyone occupied. What an awesome idea!

Number 1 – “99 Red Balloons” … literally and musically

This is by far my most favorite idea. I have even suggested this one several times and been turned down very politely every time. However, I push on as I really believe this is a great idea to get the party started. Here’s the plan: We have our first dance as a couple, which gets everyone all excited, emotional, and amped. Then after the song ends, the song “99 Red Balloons” comes on (either original or Goldfinger cover) which starts off slow, serving as a great transition that builds up into the chorus. When the chorus starting playing, my plan is to have 99 red balloons (that were earlier filled and set up to fall on the dance floor) come down and “rain” on everybody. This would do many things, including:

1. Create a unique dancing environment that you don’t see often.

2. Inspire those who are still sitting down to get up and join the dance party.

3. Make for some really cool photo shots.

4. Get the dancing start off right, as so many people need a reason to get out of their chair.

It’s an insanely good idea, and I know that someone would have to clean the balloons up almost right away, and/or popping them becomes an unnecessary fun game for many. But that’s one side effect that I’m willing to live with to get everything rocking.

[Sara's note: I love, love, LOVE this idea, but it's just way to dang expensive to even think about doing.]

Honorable mentions:

Giant sports ticker. Instead of having a slide show rolling through pictures for hours, we can mix in a sports and news ticker that mostly updates fantasy baseball and Seattle Mariners scores. This one didn’t make the cut as the Mariners so far aren’t worth watching…

Life-size giraffe-shaped cake. While it’s not a feasible idea, even a 1/8th scale version would be pretty sweet.

Wedding mascot. Mascots are fun, get people going, and are typically good performers. But, Sara’s terrified of mascots, so that one’s out.

I won’t have any less fun at our wedding if none of my ideas come to fruition, but it was fun to think about setting these things up and remembering them for years and years. Positive and negative comments are welcome!


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